I have absolutely no money to spare...but should I look into therapy?

Brandon, I don't care how long your question is. You are a human being, reaching out to others. Don't listen to any negative comments here for the first step. There are always going to be mean people out there. I feel for you and your confusion and pain. I just want you to know that you are a valuable and worthy person, despite of things that happened in your past and the fact that you had to turn to , just outlines how difficult things must have been. I think that therapy is wonderful - I've known many people who have come through horrific abuse, suicide attempts, and drugs after being in therapy. You are not destroyed. You just haven't found yourself yet. Your spirit and your strength of character have kept you alive and surviving which makes you an incredible inspiration! Finding the right therapist isn't easy though but I would recommend Cognitive Behavioral therapy. You can always find out if there is some kind of subsidy for people who can't afford therapy. If you are working in a place that has benefits, sometimes they will cover therapy. Others base it on your income. You could start by contacting your doctor and perhaps he/she could recommend a therapist who is reasonable. I wish you all the best. It's going to be a long journey, but you have come so far. You have many gifts that you could share to help others. Blessings to you...